The Big Blue Tick



Pregnant. I am pregnant. P R E G N A N T. No matter how many times I said this to myself on the 5th June 2014 it didn't feel real. Even now,  37 weeks on, it doesn't always seem real. One minute I'm a 20 year old girl with a  care free and pretty easy life to the next minute where I am going to become a mother. Its fair to say for any woman, at any age, whether the pregnancy was planned or not, it takes you by surprise! My body was now home to a tiny little human life, a life that I was now going to grow inside me for 9 months. Everything I did, everything I ate, everything I felt, this little life was now going to be influenced by. HOLY SHIT.

I was at work when I found out, I did a test in the work toilets.. Not glamorous but I wasn't expecting to see the big blue cross. I had been feeling a little sick, well a lot sick and my special time of the month hadn't arrived when it was supposed to, so like any reasonable woman who tracks every single period down to the very minute it started, I thought id do the test for peace of mind and there it was, the big blue cross. Everything from that moment of that day is a bit of a blur, but here I am 9 months on and coming to the end of the most life changing experience I have ever gone through. In the last 37 weeks I believe I must of felt every single emotion, been sick more times than I thought humanly possible (heads up ladies, morning sickness doesn't just mean the morning), watched a body I was relatively happy with be stretched to the point I'm not sure there is much more it can stretch without exploding, but most of all in the 37 weeks I have seen myself change from a girl to a woman. I have learnt things about myself, about my body, about my partner and about life, things that I didn't think I would learn for a very long time. I am 100 percent, truly, madly and deeply in love with a little person that I haven't even met yet. I would and will do whatever I can for this little life that I have grown inside me. I'm not even sure where I am going with this post, sometimes its just nice to write things down, because before I know it the little kicks and hiccups I feel in my belly are going to become tiny hands and cuddles in my arms.